There is a movie from early 2000 s, that is called “The Confession of a Shopaholic”. It’s a heartwarming, funny comedy, about a girl who is struggling with a shopping addiction, and it has the most cuddly and adorable soundtrack – Don’t forget me by Macy Gray. As I set, curled up in my soft, fluffy blanket, watching this movie the second time around, I realized that this one is a little bit dipper than just a usual chick flick. While it is fun, sweet and quirky at times, this movie tells something very important, in a way that everyone can comprehend. Just like the Girl with the Green Scarf wraps up dull and boring concepts of financial discipline in adorable pink polka dot paper, “The Confession of a Shopaholic” delivers one very strong but often overlooked idea – things don’t define us, we ourselves do. You will say that the op has gone delusional and of course, you define yourself and maybe you are right. But just bear with me a little bit more. Tell me, what does your facebook feed look like? What is the first thing you see when you open facebook? I usually see a lot of random adds, junk websites, pop-ups that appear on my feed, because of recent irrelevant google search. Those things are so colorful and captivating, that I often spend most of my time, browsing through those ads and thinking that yes, yes! I most definitely need that exact shade of lipstick to make my face look thinner. I must have that piece of sports gear because the ad says that new sports gear will motivate me to go and work out. I am told 376 different ways to build my glutes, and abs, because without those, I am not attractive and boys will not like me. On the opposite web site, I am told that not all that superfluous bull shit matters and boys will like me for my sense of humor, and here are 746 full proof jokes for the first date to get him! Then I am led into believing, that serious adult businesswomen do not wear anything except heels and bodycon dresses, or any solid color button up shirts. I am told that if I want to be taken seriously, or if I want people to trust me, I mustn’t have tattoos or piercings in any visible places and that wearing uggs make me look stupid in the office. Then there comes a second, deeper layer of stigmas. I was told (yet again) that only a stable office job would give me enough income and respect on society. I want to pursue an academic career? But I’ll die in poverty! Plus, I’ll have to deal with annoying students! Oh, I want to do something creative? Oh grow up already, you’re 26 close to no work experience, there’s no way you’ll ever be able to afford a house if you’ll become a photographer etc. etc. In about 300 words, I put myself into boundaries, defined for me by others. While I struggle a lot to fit in, I’m becoming less confident and happy. In the end, I’ll probably end up working an unsatisfactory job that, from my point of view, has absolutely no value. I have a reason to believe that you, yes you on the other side, reading my mad rant, you dear feel the same way. I could suggest getting rid of all our social media, but at this time and age that would be plain stupid. Instead, I want to tell you, me, and everyone out there, NOTHING AND NO ONE CAN DEFINE YOU. Don’t think that because they can’t fit you in, you’re not good. Don’t think, that because of some irrelevant reasons, you won’t be successful, or happy, or loved. Don’t put yourself in a box, be unique YOU and love yourself first.